Month: August 2017

Teach Breathing, Teach Control

What if you could stop your child from crying hysterically or throwing a tantrum in a few seconds? Whether your kid hurt himself, didn’t get his way and got upset or is for whatever reason having a strong, painful (and probably very loud) reaction/experience… there are very powerful and simple tools you can use to help your child regain control of themselves.

I’ve been practicing meditation and yoga since I was about 14 years old. Depression has always been a part of my life and simply by meditating and using breathing techniques I’ve been able to stay away from medication. Not to say medication is wrong, for some people it’s the only way to cope, but as people we should generally strive for balance and peace within ourselves, regardless who we are or what we do. It’s like the difference between someone who exercises and someone who doesn’t, obviously exercise benefits us.

We don’t have to get into hippie phrases and chanting ohm, we can stick to the simple physiological benefits of increased oxygen intake, lowering adrenaline and cortisol, slowing down breathing and heart rate or simply reducing stress hormones. I will give you a simple and concrete example.…

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Potty Training, The Easy Way!

It was a funny coincidence that Ean decided to stop peeing in the diaper right at the time when I wrote the previous article, asking for advice about your experiences with potty training. I got a lot of response and feedback from people both in the comments and especially in messages and I thank you all for indulging me with your experiences and giving me more knowledge and feedback to weigh into my own ideas of how to get this done and this is how it went.

Let’s start at the beginning. On purpose, for as long as I’ve been able to hold Ean with one arm, I’ve been taking him to the bathroom with me to see and understand the connection of how to use the toilet. Once he had started to walk, which was quite late, about 1 year and 3 months, I thought it would be time to start working on the toilet skills. At about 1 year and a half I started putting him on the potty and the toilet on a regular basis but he was very reluctant, simply because he hadn’t developed the muscle control needed yet. He was still heavily relying on the diaper and didn’t have control over when it was time to pee or poop.

Once summer came around the bend and it got hotter, I let him run around naked in hopes that he would be more inclined to just run to the potty and do his business, but I could have him on the toilet for 5-15 minutes and still as soon as he got off the toilet, he could have an accident somewhere around the house. I was stupid and thought I could teach him by making negative associations, not scolding him, but showing disappointment and frustration with his actions, as I do with behavioural discipline to teach him when he’s doing something bad but here is the key point……

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One Sweet Moment Out Of Many

Pretty much since Ean was born, I’ve sung and rocked him to sleep for all his naps. Since about 1 month back though, he prefers to be put down in the crib directly, or like for the past week, to fall asleep next to me in bed and then placed in the crib.

Today he modified his request again and it was the most adorable thing. First I had to lay down next to him, then he wanted to face me and hug me. He kept shifting position, kissing my shoulder, my cheeks, holding my face in his hands and looking into my eyes, saying mama, papa, Ean.

Then he turned to his back and continued, mama, papa, Ean. Finally he took the position his mother finds to be heaven on earth, the spoon.

And there, while continuing to kiss my hands and arms and repeating, mama, papa, Ean… he slowly closed his eyes and drifted to sleep.

What a privilege it is to go to bed with your heart so filled with peace, love and happiness. To be wrapped up in your maker whose embrace and gentle breath gave you life not too long ago. To be in a cocoon of your own flesh and blood, your limbs woven tight with mine, like the DNA that binds us.

These days that pass so fast and slow, weaving time, experiences and memories into a person who will one day go out into the world and make your own mark on it with tools honed with the souls and minds of the people who love you the most. And long after we’re gone, that gentle breath that gave you life, comfort and peaceful sleep, will be yours to pass on in every word you speak and every action you take, for the rest of your life.

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It Starts With, Hello!

Being a parent can be quite isolating. Most of your time goes to fulfil someone else’s needs and your needs and wishes become second priority (if even that!). A simple way to break out of that monotonous pattern is to simply look up from your mobile device or helicoptering around your kid for a moment when you’re at the playground and see what’s going on around you.

There are tons of people in the same position as you, or similar at least, and if you have a regular schedule of going to the playground, most likely, so do the people around you. So, if you’re there and they’re there it probably means you have the same schedule.

This is the case with us and these two lovely people in the photo. We started chit chatting once we started recognising each other coming to the same park regularly and one day I told them we’re going to the beach for a swim. They decided to join in and since then we see each other every day and the kids love to play together. We go to the park and play and then we go swimming. Whether on the beach or the park they love to play and learn from each other in a natural, socially mature way.

I see parents complain all the time about their kids and their obsession with mobile devices but kids learn from us and if we ourselves can’t be bothered looking up from our phones long enough to interact with the people around us, why do we expect our kids to be any different? It’s easy, fundamental, rewarding and it all starts with, hello.

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